Of all the holidays that involve special sugary treats (all of them except Groundhog Day), Easter is the hardest for me to ignore. There is something about those little, pastel-shaped candies and treats that make me lost all willpower and control. Halloween’s not too bad, since I haven’t been through the season of willpower tests (Christmas to Super Bowl), and I can be cynical enough about Valentine’s Day to keep it together mostly.
But by Easter, I am a little beaten down in the willpower department. And the stuff is so freakin’ CUTE. I don’t know why I want to EAT cute things, but I do. Plus, let’s be honest. Cadbury eggs? Say no more. Chocolate filled with something? I mean, if deserted on an island and choosing 2 foods, that would be easy. Cadbury eggs and chocolate custard-filled bismark donuts from Deerfields Bakery. Since I’m on a deserted island, things aren’t looking too good anyways.
So Trainer Guy was looking at my calorie log last week and noting my consumption of chocolate eggs. (And yes, I write it all down-how else can I get material for this blog?) He was a little surprised about the amount of chocolate eggs consumed. I was a little proud I kept it in the single digits. I would say it was an improvement over last Easter. I could count the amount of eggs I ate in bags last year.
That said, I am trying a new tactic. Instead of showing my love for Easter candy by eating it, I am going poetic. It’s pretty ugly, but think about it this way- you can laugh twice. Once at the poem, and once at what a terrible poet I would make! That’s not to say I am not going to have a visit from the Easter bunny, but I will keep the Cadburys in the single digits. Promise. 😉
Ode to Holiday Candy
O holiday candy, hallmark
Of another eating season,
Shiny foils hide yummy treats,
Making me lose all reason.
Colors and shape change by date,
Each time brings a treasure.
The amount of chocolate eggs I eat,
I simply cannot measure.
Sugary, peep-like, or chocolate,
It doesn’t really even matter.
Filled or solid, dark or light,
Hell, I’ve eaten raw cake batter.
From Halloween to Easter,
My willpower continuously tested,
Candy, hearts, eggs, bunnies,
City Market is completely infested.
And just when I’ve sworn to be good,
To no longer touch a single bit,
Along comes a good-hearted package or person,
Ahh, screw it. It’s just one piece, isn’t it?