My mom said that blogging about how I am doing on my own would be good for me. So I guess I will take her advice…for once.
I know lots of people who have lived without their spouse for extended periods of time, and while some might argue that 5 weeks isn’t so long (including 6 days of shared vacation!), it’s becoming an eternity to me. And kudos to all of you who do– you are amazing, seriously. I am almost in a new rhythm on my own, and I am not entirely happy about it. Added to that fact is the stress of moving and packing up a house on my own. We have packers coming, but you have to clear out your own crap before they come, so you aren’t unpacking and going, Why the hell did I bring this 5 gallon bucket full of garbage with me across the country?
Since I am not working, all my life consists of is cleaning up, clearing out, and
hanging out with delightfully entertaining my kids and the dog. All the time. Every meal, bedtime, early morning wake-up (the dog, not the kids! GRRR!) is my responsibility. Which is OK- that’s my choice, but I really love our routine together. OK, I really miss early morning workouts and my husband’s cooking, if I am being honest. With him around, I don’t usually find myself digging into a Costco- sized bag of popcorn for dinner. With a side of celery, of course.
I missed our shared sense of humor. There’s no one to laugh with at home anymore. Not that there is much to laugh about, since all I talk about is moving, which is about the least humor-filled process I have experienced. I am tired of talking about insurance, bills, contracts, doctor’s appointments, real estate, did you do this? No, I forgot, Well we need to…blah blah blah.
So it’s not that I want to leave, I just want to get this part over with. There is a significant difference, I realized, which is a small comfort.
Good idea to get that off my chest, Mom. Thanks.